Despite my body being still, my heartbeat was pounding, my breath was shallow, and my mind was racing to figure out what caused this feeling. The sun was still shining, everything around me looked to be normal and safe, but stress swirled in my body. Having no explanation, I kept moving and eventually forgot about the feeling until the next morning when the same thing happened. It happened all week before I understood that I was feeling a memory.  For the last five years, until I started working at Mindful, I went commercial prawn fishing in British Columbia to make enough money to go to university. It was on spring days like this, when the air was cool and crisp in the early morning, with the promise of a warm day ahead, that myself and the rest of the crew would prepare to go to sea for a couple months. That job was empowering and awesome in some ways, but I felt considerable stress every year about leaving almost all contact with the people I love to do a dangerous job at sea.  I knew before that our bodies hold memories, trauma, and emotions, but I’d never felt it like this. Since I put those pieces together, I’ve noticed some other ways my body holds stress and trauma from past experiences. But now that I have this knowledge, I can name the sensation, take a breath, feel my feet on the ground where I stand, and bring my attention to the present moment. I can find comfort in the truth that right now, I am here, not there, and I am safe. 

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